More Fun with Shakespeare! (Sillyquies)

5 03 2012

To run, or not to run   by   Billy F.

To run,or not to run: that is the question,

Whether’tis colder in the feet to suffer

Theice and snow of my yard

Or totake steps against the cold of my yard

And byopposing end it? To run: to fall

Nomore and, by a fall to say, we end

Thecold and the thousand natural cuts

Thatfeet are heir to ’tis a consummation

Devoutlyto be wish’d to walk, to fall

To layperchance to cold, ay there’s the problem

For inthe fall of death what toe fungus might infect?

Whenwe have shuffled off these cold feet

Must we give pause? To ice

For who would bear the cold and ice of my yard

The oppresses fall and the runners win

To solve or not to solve by  Madison

To solve or not to solve: that is the question

whether ’tis nobler to do the right mathematics

or the slings and arrows of logic and reasoning

or to take the arms of algebra or calculus

and by opposing solve the?

To solve, to determine, to determine; and by determine we end

the confusion is heir to, ’tis a consummation

devoutly to be wished.

To solve, to determine, to determine: pechance a drean to buy a mathematics book:

ay, there’s the answer

Soliloquy by Zack M.

To learn, or not to learn: that is the question,

Whether ‘tis nobler in the mind to suffer,

The slings and arrows of outrageous urges to slack,

Or to take arms against a sea of challenges,

And by opposing, end them? To learn: to slack,

No more; and, by concentrating to say: we end,

The heart-ache and the thousand natural challenges,

That mind is heir to, a consummation,

Devoutly to be wish’d. To learn: to slack,

To slack: a chance to sleep,

For in that sleep what dreams may come,

When we have shuffled all this mortal slacking.

Soliloquy by Wylie H.

To pull or not to pull

To pull or not to pull, that is the question:

Whether ‘tis better for us  to  pull

The lever of the tractor beam

Or to grab one amongst a sea of cows

And by grabbing pull it to the saucer;

No more; for, the cow may be hurt

By the tugging of the hand and the thousand natural shakes

That hands are heir to, ‘tis a happy cow

Devoutly to be wished. To pull, to strain;

To strain, perchance to injure: ay there’s a question;

For in the pain of strain why not use the tractor beam?

To Take a Cookie or not to Take a Cookie  by Sebastian D.

To take a cookie or not to take a cookie: that is the question

Whether‘tis nobler in the mouth to suffer

The wrath of disgraceful parents,

Or beararms against the wrath of trouble

And byhiding end it? To get a beating, to cry;

No more;and by a beating, we mean an end

The stomachache and the thousand angry yells

That earsare heir to, ‘tis consumption

Devoutly to eat. To ache, to eat;

To eat: perchanced to munch: ay, there’s the chocolate chip

For in that stomach ache of death, dreams may come

 To Breathe, or Not to Breathe  by  V. Miller

To Breathe or Not to Breathe: that is the question:

Whether ‘tis nobler of the mind to suffer

oxygen deprivation from the lungs,

Or to take arms against cigarette smoke,

And by opposing, end it? To breathe: to be free;

No more; and, by a held breath, to say we end

The lung-ache and the thousand unnatural products

That cigarettes comprise, ‘tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wish’d. To breathe, to be free;

To be free: perchance to dream: aye, there’s the stench

For in the freedom of breathing, what cancers may come

When we have taken the breath,

Must give us pause. There’s the respect

That shortens our life.

Lilje’s Soliloquy  by  Lily B.

Tochange font, or not to change font: that is the question:

Whether‘tis nobler to stay to Times New Roman

Tobrave the typos and glitches of outrageous boredom,

Orto take arms against the sea of requirements,

Andby opposing such, end such? To not type, to write;

Nomore; and by not typing to say we end

The finger-acheand the million natural sores

Thatknuckles are heir to, ‘tis a final word

Sincerelyto be typed. To not type, to write;

Tonot type, and if to find another cure to boredom, ay, there’s the trouble;

Forin not typing what new remedies may come

Whenwe have started to write by hand,

Mustgive our hands rest. Respect thy hands

Thatmakes chaos in a long essay.

A Hamlet Parody  by  Lindsey H.

To write, or not to write: that is the question:

Whether‘tis nobler in the pen to suffer

Thepain of writing to your grandmother,

Orto battle the potent pen on paper,

Andby opposing end it? To scribble: to scrawl;

Nomore; and, by a scrawl to say we careless

Theagonizing torture and the thousand penetrating nags

That afflict us, ‘tis a culmination

Sincerely to be dreamt. To scribble, to scrawl;

To scrawl: conceivably to vividness: ay, there’s the blankness;

Forin that moment of torture what bedtimes may arise

When we have drained out this dreaded ink

Musterupt in triumph. There’s the respect

 

Messy Room Soliloquy    by  Ryan Q.

To clean or not to clean: that is the question:

Whether ‘tis wiser in the mind to tire the toil and boredom of pointless boredom,

Or to not clean the mess in the room,

And by ignoring the mess, leave it?

To play: to ignore; not clean;

And by ignoring the mess we end the toil and thousand scattered objects that I’m meant to clean,

‘Tis a required task to do.

To play, to ignore; to ignore: perchance to play:

Ah, there’s the problem; for when we have ignored this messy room,

We have time to play,

But I’ll clean the room anyway

 

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