Humorous Questions That Make You Think Twice Part #1

8 09 2009

 Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

If money doesn’t grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Why do you have to “put your two cents in” . . . but it’s only a penny for your thoughts?”   Where’s that extra penny going?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you  naked anyway.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose‑fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose‑fitting clothing, I wouldn’t have signed up  in  the first place!!!

Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply  press ‘Ctrl Alt Delete’ and start all over?

Why is it that our children can’t read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but why do fat cells live forever?

How can you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

Did Adam and Eve have navels?

Does anyone ever vanish with a trace? Or disappear in fat air instead of thin air?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

If Fed Ex and UPS merge, would they call it Fed UP?

If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar do you believe him?

If a mute child swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?

If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, who came up with, “Quit while you’re still ahead?”

If the Energizer Bunny attacks someone, is it charged with battery?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

What did we do before the Law of Gravity was passed?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Why are we afraid of falling? Shouldn’t we be afraid of the sudden stop?

Why do airlines call flights nonstop? Don’t they all stop eventually?

Why is the alphabet in that order?

Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

You know how most packages say “Open here” What is the protocol if the package says, “Open somewhere else?”

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can’t they make the whole plane with the same substance?

How do you know when it’s time to tune your bagpipes?

What would happen if you put a slinky on the Aup@ escalator?

Where does the light go when the light goes out?

How can I stop payment on a reality check?

Is it true cannibals won’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

I you were invited to a party by a psychic…would you have to RSVP?

Why aren’t apartments called togetherments?

If a stealth bomber crashes in the woods, does it make a sound?

Have you ever stopped to think…..and forgot to start again?

What happens when you get scared half to death a second time?

When do you use a solar flashlight?

If you arrest a mime does he have the right to remain silent?

If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

Why do we say something is out of whack?  What is a whack?

Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?

Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?

Why are they called “stands” when they are made for sitting?

Why is it call “after dark” when it really is “after light”?

Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” make the unexpected expected?

Why are a “wise man” and a “wise guy” opposites?

Why do “overlook” and “oversee” mean opposite things?

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

How come abbreviated is such a long word?

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren’t we clean when we use them?

Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

How come when you call a wrong number, someone is always home?

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world ‘up over’?

Does that screwdriver really belong to Philip?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

For information on having Bob as a guest speaker or for products see his website at……..



42 responses

12 12 2009

You do we park in driveways but we drive on parkways??

14 04 2010

Nice Job

20 11 2012
Sneha V

ya its really cool ! ! !

26 05 2010

Why is there braille on a drive through ATM?

If matter is what everything is made up from, is matter made from matter?

16 06 2011

Why do you bake cookies?
Why do you cook bacon?

5 07 2011

Why do 7-11’s have locks on their doors?

27 07 2011

these are good questions!!

what if the light at the end of the tunnel when we die is just us being born in our next life?
these are the questions that haunt me!;)

15 09 2011

wow!! thats deep!

7 08 2011

why do people blow their nose and then look at what’s in the tissue?

3 09 2011

If experience is the best teacher, do all surgeons go through surgery during their training?

25 09 2011
Harry Bainbridge

No. people in Australia, (down under), don’t call the rest of the world up over.

25 09 2011
Harry Bainbridge

We just say what country it is.

20 11 2011
Think Twice… | contributingeducation

[…] larger list can be found here! Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this post. This entry was posted in […]

9 12 2011

why does caregiver and caretaker means the same thing?

6 03 2012


20 03 2012

Why do people go on a free way and then pay a toll

21 04 2012

Why don’t stalkers just get twitters, so they can follow whoever they want ?

30 05 2012

Reblogged this on blogster21 and commented:

23 06 2012

wierd and confusing question and it does make me think twice

26 06 2012

Why is it difficult to accept failure? than winning?

3 08 2012

what is a sesame if we never let it grow past a seed?

8 08 2012

Well they certainly made me think twice LOL. But i’d like to know where actually is the middle of nowhere? And where does your lap go when you stand up?

17 10 2012
Marcus Simmons

Y are there gates around cemeteries..they aren’t going anywere

7 11 2012
Ryan Holley

What if we perceive the world as north is top and south is bottom if there’s the possibility that the universe is really reversed?
What if we are already dead but we are just seeing it flash before our lives?
Why are short people the last to be hit by rain but the first to drown?
What if what you consider red looks like brown to me but we both consider it red because that was how we have always known it and we all see a different color pallet?

14 05 2013

What if color blind people see the actual color of what something is, but are minds perceive to see it in many different ways?

3 01 2013

finally someone understands me

25 03 2013

you wouldn’t believe how many times I had to explain that to other people.

17 04 2013

if a Siamese twin kills the other half would it be murder or suiside?

6 05 2013

‘Wise guy’ is used sarcastically… You don’t say “Shut up wise man”..

31 05 2013
Angelina Conti

These are SO great ! I really enjoyed them….especially the tall building one! A few that fell flat for me though were: The plow guy obviously takes his plow truck home the night before! My husband plows and that’s what him and the guys do. Doctors leave when you get changed because it’s very uncomfortable to get changed in front of them, as opposed to having them move your gown around while they check you out! Lipstick is a stick that you rub on your lips, and most people hang a bath towel the 1st few times they use it, but because it keeps getting wet it and doesnt dry quickly it starts to smell .Lastly they cannot make a whole plane outta the black box material or it would be way too heavy to fly! 🙂 Some of these are SO funny and made me literally LOL..I felt the need to answer the few silly ones though 😉

8 07 2013
Hermione Granger

why do we park on drive ways and drive on park ways?

10 07 2013
Brian Konz

Would you be able to see a comet traveling speed of light directly at you before it hit?

10 07 2013
Brian Konz

Can you really go down an incline?

11 07 2013

Why two planes almost colliding is labeled as a “near miss?”

11 07 2013

Why are seat belts a must in cars and minivans yet there are no seat belts in school buses?


11 07 2013

One more: Why do slow drivers drive on the fast lane?

9 08 2013

That was a great list of questions. Thx

14 08 2013

What if your dad or mon was you from the future who’s parents abandoned him or her when he or she was a baby?

18 10 2013

Why is it if it goes by ship it’s cargo but if it goes by car it’s a shipment?

27 11 2013

What if we all have the same favorite color but we all just see it differently because we have a different color pallet

24 05 2014

why do they call it a building if its already been built

3 07 2014

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
An odd end.

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